Written by Emily
While trolling Pinterest late one night, I discovered a tutorial for decluttering the entire house in eight weeks. Eight weeks to a clutter-free home? Promise? Pinned it!
I downloaded the pdf and went straight to work on the master bedroom closet while the children were asleep for the night. Like all things, I started with more enthusiasm than most people can tolerate. My husband rolled his eyes, dodged flying shoes and left the room.
Hours later, I was still working on my closet–organizing by color; trying on clothes; preparing a bag for donation, one for tossing, and one for our community yard sale. I checked the list. Designated time for this task: 30 minutes. Whaaaa? Surely that was a misprint. I don’t think I could organize the contents of a thimble in 30 minutes; I’m just not wired for efficient organization.
The closet led to the dresser, which led to the linen closet, which led to the cabinet under the sink in the bathroom. It spiraled out of control; imagine a Russian nesting doll but in reverse. With every item I relocated, another 4 or 5 or 700 needed a new home. I wanted to cry. Ok. I did. I cried a little.
And my cry face is worse than this:
Suddenly the entire upstairs was in shambles, and I had an empty dresser in the hallway.
I went to bed cursing Pinterest, myself and well, everyone. Sorry.
The next morning, the dresser was still there.
Have you heard people say, “it will get worse before it gets better?” I hate those people.
Have you heard people say, “if you have lemons, make lemonade?” Those people are worse.
Have you heard people say, “if there is a dresser in your hallway making it almost impossible to maneuver around it without muttering nastiness under your breath, create a foyer at the entrance of your home using the dresser as a lovely organizational piece?” No? That person is the worst to live with…just ask my family.
I looked at that dresser and saw a solution to my children’s complete inability to ever find their shoes. Ever. I mean ever. Sometimes they can find one. And it comes as a complete surprise every time we leave the house that they might need shoes (or pants, but the dresser fixes the shoe issue). I understand there’s a learning curve with everything, but my son has walked with shoes on his feet for approximately 1,825 days. I thought 27 repetitions made something habit. No.
Back to the dresser.
With my boo’s help (is anyone still saying “boo”?), I got that dresser downstairs into the front room. Nevermind that there were two other pieces of furniture that needed to be emptied and relocated before the dresser was moved into place. Damn you, Pinterest!
And, of course, the dresser needed some adjustments if I was going to make it work as a quintessential organizational piece.
First, I had to remove some drawers. I wanted baskets at the bottom for easy shoe storage:
Right now, the dresser is still stocked for the winter, but before summer is in full swing, I’ll use the drawers for beach towels, hats, goggles and other summer staples. So far, it works!
And my closet? It’s organized! I even put a shelving unit from the basement inside the closet for better storage. Oh, the fun I had! I thought I lost at least one of the children amid the horror that erupted in the house. But everyone is accounted for now.
Up next, organizing the kitchen cabinets. It’ll probably end with me knocking out a wall if my family doesn’t get to the tranq darts first.
By the way, this morning, my son couldn’t find his shoes. They were in the shoe baskets. But I downloaded a pdf for eliminating clutter not delivering miracles, so what can I expect?